I feel less grumpy today than I've felt in awhile. I started taking some mood pills with reishi and lemon balm and other stuff. And I've gone almost 48 hours without weed and I can feel my brain cells starting to grow back, so that's nice.
I danced for 20-30 minutes today and felt older and more out of shape than I felt a week ago and I swear my stomach got flubbier since then too. I don't mind but I'd prefer more muscle so I can feel healthier. If I want to emerge from my apartment an athlete, I probably need to be push myself a little bit harder and spend less time hunched over a laptop. All the sitting is terrible for my posture, even though I take breaks to stretch over a yoga wheel, but I'm sure it's not enough. I know I can do better.
I sound like one of those... fitness people. I am not a fitness people. But pandemic has me staying home more and hiking less, and I don't want my whole body to atrophy into a useless blob. I want to grow up to be a 90 year old contortionist breakdancer, or at least a hot babe.
Well. I'll keep trying. Now that I seem to be wanting to be weed-free again I'll probably have more motivation. I can add a tolerable amount of ab work to my daily routine. Something easy, like 10 repetitions per day. I don't need a six pack, I just want to feel healthy and live up to my potential.
My appetite kinda sucks right now, which I'm sure is due to weed withdrawal. I also had a holocaust nightmare last night for the first time in awhile, even though I meditated before bed. At least I didn't wake up screaming like I do sometimes.
The homework I'm assigning myself today is to create a new yoga routine that concentrates on ab muscles, spine flexibility, and leg flexibility.
I miss my hometown. And so many things. But I'm still chugging along, trying to make the best of my solo time. I'm grateful to be alive and breathing and still reasonably sane. (I think.)
3:32 p.m. - 2021-03-10