I dreamed I was in a fender bender involving three cars, and insurance dudes were trying to determine who was at fault while my dad quietly waited for a verdict. When I woke up I'd received a spam text about car insurance and my mouth was full of blood. Weird.
In the dream I was stoned, the driver behind me was drunk, and the driver in front was sober, but no one noticed. None of us three women cared about our dented cars, it was more about the impatience of waiting for men to determine fault so we could continue on our way. Metaphor for lockdown maybe, combined with my feelings about male authority figures tediously assigning blame without understanding the situation, which was already resolved among the women. I was sandwiched in the middle of two extremes. Makes sense.
Trying to make the best of this repetitive isolation so here is a gratitude list for mental health insurance:
- My bungee trampoline is also my coffee table now. Now I can jump in front of my big windows so people on the street below can watch me go boing boing and laugh at me.
- I also hope they're amused by the strategically positioned mannequin's ass in my window. I am.
- Added new music to my playlists.
- Freshly laundered blankets and sheets.
- Opened new glass bottle of cream for my coffee. I save glass milk bottles for vases. Cute and sturdy.
- Trimmed my bangs and washed my hair to prep for dyeing because it feels nice even if no one sees.
- Grateful for my air filter because outdoor air quality has been unusually poor.
- VERY grateful for my health and the health of loved ones. Let's keep it up please!
- Grateful I have a functioning heater and bathtub and plenty of things to keep me warm and comfortable.
- Plants.
- Meditations.
- Very cute pets.
- Spring is around the corner! I cannot wait to gaze at giant trees again, and flowers, and feel sun on my skin.
8:19 a.m. - 2022-01-13