So, apparently when I was drinking, I texted a fuckboy from 3 years ago, WHILE I WAS WITH MY DATE. (He had left a voicemail which prompted my text.) The date and I are newly unspokenly partnered in an awkward gray area between dating and relationshipping but he probably wouldn't like me to sex other people, based on things he said while drunk, and which I gently avoided any verbal contract about.
Another interesting twist: This fuckboy took me on what appeared to be a proper date tonight. He wanted to apologize for how he was before sobriety. He's been sober for 2.5 years!!! SOBER!!! What a rarity among men in my life!
Wow, so, he totally took me on an actual date, and it went surprisingly well. I sort of trust him more now that I've met his sober self. Wow. That was so surreal. And now I'm just confused because ... I thought he was bad but now that he's sober he seems like a possibly better option than the new almost-boyfriend, in that regard. I should keep both, because men can be so wishy washy about intimacy, and having more than one prevents me from making anyone feel smothered.
Anyway, Imma stew on that. Basically, I may have just signed myself up for a sober boyfriend to go with my collection of drunks. But at least I'm feeling good.
3:35 a.m. - 2019-11-21