Now that I'm alone all the time again I'm thinking about how I can safely go outside without being raped or mugged, and I think taking myself on a cemetery picnic to hang out with my great great great grandmother would be nice and relatively safe and an easy way to stay socially distanced from the living. I can bring my blanket to sit on and watch the clouds and feel close to a maternal figure who I'm certain would have cared about me. I can speak to her in Spanish and bring a little incense to burn and maybe a candle and a book and whisper stories to her until the sun sets if I want. Maybe I'll do that today...
Happy memory:
going to art openings and buzzing on free wine and being complimented on my style by nice women and running around giggling and silly with someone who values me
Today's affirmation:
Self care is my gift to myself and I deserve it.
Today I will focus on shifting my pattern of:
feeling sorry for myself instead of putting on my big girl pants and making the best of it.
I am grateful for:
articles for guidance and wisdom, creative methods of social connection in times of physical distance, pets, my small but nice place to hibernate in, art supplies, baths, books, hope and optimism, dreams, meditation and other coping tools, memories, music, beauty, lions mane, ashwagandha, excellent delivery options where I live, the sequin mask I ordered so I can be extra regardless of circumstance, that if i must be alone i am at least really good company, naps, sweet smelling candles, incense, soft pretty lights, the ambience i've created in my living space that transports me to another time and place and is perfectly me, nostalgia even if it makes me feel more than i want to sometimes, edison bulbs, antiques, old books, amber colored glass, gilded things, tiles, perfumes and oils, heirloom fruits and vegetables, family heirlooms, stars, the moon, the mysteries of life, honey, saffron, rosewater, pistachios, figs, citrus trees and olive trees, ancient temples, history, cemeteries
The person I am becoming will experience more:
top physical health
I have an opportunity to be my future self today when I:
do a little yoga / moving meditations
When I think about who I am becoming I feel:
like a tough cookie.
11:14 a.m. - 2020-10-28