Someone in my dream said humanity would end in 2044. Plausible?
My body has rebalanced itself, I've taken a break from weed, and my dreams are getting interesting again. My new period cycle seems set to begin on the new moon. My dad's indigenous buddhist wife burns incense once on full moon and once on new moon. It's a very ancient near eastern tradition too, and it made me respect her more to know I'm not the only "witch" around here. She fucks with herbal medicine too.
I haven't actually been doing any rituals in awhile, but I think rituals are grounding and I should start doing those things again, especially fridays, new moon, and full moon. Like mini meditations or an expression of gratitude, they stop the mental chatter and serve as a reminder that everything is sacred. They also help me feel connected with my ancestors at times when I may otherwise feel isolated or lacking support or guidance. To remember they are alive in me.
I've always been a little different that way. When I lost my first grandparent as a teenager I smelled and felt her everywhere for a couple weeks and my mom did too. After that I prayed to her instead of "god" when I needed what only she could understand. When I lost my second grandparent he appeared at my door in a dream. I silently called out for him for specific things I know he'd understand. Sometimes you need a specific type of love that only one person knows how to give. So I'd reach out to the one who'd be able to relate the most, who'd have the most compassion for the specific circumstance. I know they wouldn't abandon me and would help if they were able to.
If nothing else I find solace knowing that they gifted their wisdom to me while alive, and my brain has kept all their gifts safely archived. I'm made of them, and that's comforting.
Grateful for ancestors, dreams, life, and memory.
I also dreamed I was visiting my mom. She lived in a big brand new house where our old house used to be and it was beautiful and filled with plants and all our old furniture. I wanted to live with her in that house again with all the plants she kept green and healthy. My earbuds fell into the pool. I dove under to retrieve them and put them back together. It felt good to be home. I didn't really want to leave.
10:27 a.m. - 2021-07-08