So many sirens today. Friday I guess.
I was direct with my dad about my feelings and why I hope he reconsiders. I was a little pointed. I said it's not responsible or rational and puts all the stress and responsibility on us, and to consider how it affects those who love him. He said he saw my perspective and would think about it.
This is random but I kind of want gold membership so I can unlock my long lost travel diary on here. I want to re-read it all, start to finish. I think it would feel good to re-live my favorite experiences, especially since travel isn't something I feel safe doing currently.
Today was somewhat stressful, between my dad and the low flying jets overhead this week for the dumb loud air show my tax dollars go to that sets off car alarms and terrorizes pets every year. So I need a gratitude list for sure.
Grateful for those who've been patient or just introverted enough to not make demands on me or get angry with me for not socializing much or even keeping in touch very well. I think I should make some effort in this area, quickly, before the mask mandate lifts, which is sure to bring another surge, but people never learn... Didn't we learn from our mistake the first time? It doesn't take a genius to see the obvious cause and effect here. Why bother even complaining. No one will hear my quiet protest. I am powerless.
On that bitter note, I'm glad I've stayed alive this long.
I honestly don't much miss 90% of the things I've missed out on. Even if it sucks sometimes, there's a safety and calm in my life now that didn't seem possible before, when I was burning the candle at both ends to keep everyone happy except myself. I like the quiet. I like not drinking the way I used to. Don't miss those hangovers that felt like I was dying on the floor. I prefer meditating before bed, and practicing dance again, and reading in the bathtub, and spending more time with animals than with humans. It's much safer and feels like the saner option.
I'm grateful I'm sleepy now. I'll probably do a short meditation and drift off. Being asleep is nice. My body will recharge and repair itself while I rest. Can't wait.
9:50 p.m. - 2021-10-08