I woke with the sunrise ...
to a strange drunk text from a guy who I thought I already made myself clear to. I'd been avoiding telling our mutual friend about his problematic behavior which feels like obsessive bullying. He's the main reason I quit social media. Then he texted me, because I'm not online anymore.
I kept shrugging it off because he's friends with a very good friend of mine, so I felt like I have to suck it up. I tried cautiously addressing the issue once and he seemed to understand and apologized, but then it started again. I can't tell if he's just terrible at conversation or if he really has an unhealthy obsession with me.
After his drunk text I think it's time to quit being cordial. For whatever reason he can't be normal, so I finally blocked him everywhere, and now I should probably say something to my friend about it, which I've been avoiding for years because I really don't want to trouble her with this, but as long as I continue to protect her from it, he continues acting shitty because he can get away with it without anyone knowing.
I assume he doesn't act this way toward her because she's married and raising a child, but I should ask. Maybe she sweeps it under the rug like I'd been doing, because he said he is suicidal, and no one wants to push someone over the edge who says they want to kill themselves every day. That was the excuse he gave me, and how do you respond to that other than pity and forgiveness? But now it feels like manipulation, like if I don't tolerate his harassment he'll kill himself. WHERE HAVE I SEEN THIS BEFORE.
Stressful. Didn't I just block that other dude last week or so?
Every time I receive unwanted messages like this from acquaintances from many years ago, I ask myself why this happens so often. I'm taken. I am an age where this probably shouldn't still be happening. I don't leave my house or interact on social media. I've gone as underground as I possibly can. I sleep at 10pm. I'm sort of old for this kind of problem, aren't I?
Most of the bothersome men are younger than me, so there's a maturity component probably. I'm in the get-off-my-lawn phase, they're still in the wooooo I'm drunk! phase.
Also how come everyone in my life had alcoholic fathers? Alcoholic dads are common I guess. Neither of my parents drank. Their addictions were socially acceptable, but addictions nonetheless. Or maybe I shouldn't analyze this as if it's my fault, for once. Other people's behavior is on them, and it's not my fault if their dads were alcoholics or if they want to kill themselves, or harass female acquaintances.
8:40 a.m. - 2022-03-26