when pandemic is "over" i think i'll never want to use the internet again ever.
ovulation hit me like a train today and i failed at having the energy to do anything at all. i took three naps, which is insane. i was sensitive to noise and it felt like sirens were happening every 15 minutes. then my cat kept attacking my leg for no reason. i think the sirens were bothering her too.
before bed i meditated, uncertain if i'd be able to sleep, because, three naps. sure enough, even after an extra long meditation i laid there dwelling on some completely unnecessary arbitrary negative thought that i can't even remember now. i laid there in frustration with whatever looping thought i was having in the moment, repeatedly trying and failing to relax my forehead muscles, until finally caving and just pacifying myself with a half-dose of weed. oh well. we can't be on top of our game every day, right? luckily ovulation grumpiness doesn't usually last long.
that's all i came here to say. maybe i'll be able to sleep now. my body feels more relaxed now and i've yawned twice while writing this paragraph. these are good signs. i spritzed my pillow with frankincense and myrrh because it calms me. already i'm rubbing my eyes and yawning a third time. i can't believe how tired i get sometimes. hormones are a trip.
ok that's all. sweet dreams wherever and whoever you are. or good morning. time is a construct.
11:43 p.m. - 2021-02-08